The Resilient Negotiator
Integral resilience instantly resets the dial, recalibrating advantage for the resilient negotiator in every transaction. It also opens opportunities for “super-optimal gains” because the parties have the ability now to see the bigger picture.
Integral resilience, developed through BHI practice, can be a game changer in negotiations. Here are 10 moves in my Artful Negotiation system that are directly enhanced by resilience (BHI) training.
- Understanding what you want. The greater your resilience, the clearer your intensions. You have less fear, and so your powers of perception increase.
- Mission of Service. The greater your Heart, the easier it is to See the Big Picture. Naturally, your mission becomes more compassionate and one of service.
- Few Needs. As resilience increases, neediness goes down. Everything resets once neediness, or the illusion of attachment, diminishes.
- Few Assumptions/Few Expectations. If you need less, your propensity to delude yourself declines. Assumptions and expectations are a way of converting reality based on neediness to a story of our choosing. As need recedes, you begin to see the world as it is without distortion.
- Accepting and Exercising the ‘No.’ The more our Heart opens, the more resilient we become, the less we fear accepting or exercising our option to say ‘no.’
- Paying the Price. Resilience is about a willingness to pay the price. The greater the Heart, the easier to accept the reverses of life.
- Learning from Errors. Error becomes our friend. We can adapt quickly and precisely.
- Going Behind the Mask. Most people wear a mask to hide their real feelings and intentions. As our Heart purifies, and the better we know ourselves, the easier it is to observe the shadow in others.
- Negotiation as Flow. Big Heart and integral resilience are natural states of acceptance, non-resistance, adaptation, balance, and flow. When we are relaxed, we have less need to hold on or to resist. This enables agile response which is a key to effective negotiation.
- See generally, Julian Gresser, Piloting Through Chaos—The Explorers Mind (2013)